2 /5 Matthew Searce: âââââ
Right, letâs get this straight⊠Iâve eaten a lot of terrible food in my life, but this? This is on another level of disaster. The friesâgood Godâthey were so soggy you could wring them out like a wet towel. Crinkle-cut? More like crinkle-ruined. Who in their right mind serves fries this limp?
Now the chicken tenders. Tenders? They should be arrested for false advertising. The breading wasnât crispy, it wasnât crunchyâit was a sad, soggy coat that slid right off like wet wallpaper. And the oilâdonât get me started on the oil. Old, stale, flavorless⊠I wouldnât fry a frozen fish stick in that rubbish. It leaves this greasy film in your mouth like youâve just licked the inside of a petrol station fryer. Absolutely vile.
And the wings⊠glossy, yes, but in the same way a puddle is glossy after it rains in the car park. One bite and all I could taste was bad oil. No seasoning, no character, nothing. Just lifeless chicken drowning in mediocrity.
This meal didnât just disappointâit was an insult. If this kitchen were on Hellâs Kitchen, Iâd shut it down in five minutes flat. Shocking, appalling, disgraceful. Save your money, and for the love of food, save your taste buds.